Most of us have made friends or acquaintances over the years. Some friends are family members, some are co-workers or club members or school mates. Many of us have stayed in touch with friends we met in our youth. What is a friendship and how do they impact our lives? There are many different types of friendships: an activity partner that you do things with, a confidente with whom you share your deepest darkest secrets, a person you can count on when in need or a person who is in alignment with your values and beliefs.
According to Alice Leexiluan, a friendship "is a relationship between two people who really care about each other. Friendships demand time and effort. A friend ...(is someone who can) support and comfort you in good times and bad". A friend is someone who has your back, who will stand up for you, who will be there when your car breaks down or there to help you if you're sick or injured, who isn't afraid to tell you the truth when you've diverted from your heathy path, who doesn't talk about you behind your back. I have been blessed with many, many dear friends over the years and treasure them as an important part of my life and my mental well-being.
In the past 2 years, 4 close friends have passed away. They were all younger than me. Since their passing, I began thinking about all my friendships. I have also started to question the quality of their lives, their relationships, their self-care, their stress levels, their diets and their overall their lifestyle habits prior to their demise. We can't be healthy if we don't have balance on all levels. Someone can eat organic food and work 70hrs/week under stress. Someone can run or be at the gym everyday and eat processed foods. To stay well, we need balance in every area. Think about your lifestyle and evaluate where you're strong and where you need support.
I am a Wellness Detective, always looking for answers, solutions to health problems, so I can share with my followers. What can I do as a Health Coach to learn from the passing of my friends How can we improve our lives, extend our lives and the lives of other seniors 55+.
I QUESTION: Why am I still alive, vital, healthy and active? Why have my younger friends, famous people, family members passed away? Of course, no one really knows the answer, but I can speculate from what I can see and from what I know about myself and about people's lifestyles.What builds or breaks down our immune system? That's my quest. Unhealthy habits that can contribute to the onset of disease and injury:. Smoking, drinking, OTC drugs, diet of processed foods or fast-foods, unresolved anger issues, lack of self-nurturing, control issues, unresolved grief and sadness, unresolved fears, unhealthy partners, dysfunctional relationships, low self-esteem.
I observe, some people live in the present and are making healthy choices while others live in the future, worried about what could happen, afraid of taking risks, afraid of people and afraid of expressing their thoughts and feelings. I understand being prepared for a future catastrophe. Yet, I strongly believe and teach its more important to be living for today, to be in this moment, and make our current mental, physical and spiritual health our first priority. Many are not taking care of their health and wellbeing today. Immediate gratification and unhealthy lifestyles choices are controlling them and take years off their lives. .
I chose to be a Health Coach 50+ years ago for 2 reasons, First: because I was a very unhealthy child and spent my childhood in doctors offices and in hospital for upper respiratory infections and earaches.Traditional medicine did not work to help me stay well. Second, I want to help other people get well and stay well as I maintain my own level of well-being. We never know what goes on deep within someone's psyche, even if they're acting as if they are living a balance lifestyle. What I've learned over the years from my experiences as a Health Coach, is that we cannot heal one aspect of our lives without addressing and healing issues in all the other areas.
We cannot continue to stay healthy without addressing and healing all aspects of our lives, the spiritual, emotional, physical and psychological. Some of our friends may exercise every day and drink a great deal of alcohol. Some eat donuts and coffee for breakfast or go to the drive-thru for fast foods. I know people who are health nuts, juicing, fasting or vegetarian, who don't do any form of physical exercise or with poor sleep quality. I know people who have resentments towards themselves or others, who exercise and eat healthy.. I know people who have no spiritual connection, follow no spiritual path.
Following a healthy lifestyle needs to be as strong an influence in your life as your exercise habits, religious beliefs and must come before anything or anyone. My lifelong commitment is just that and to be an inspiration, to help keep myself and my friends strong and healthy on all levels, mentally, spiritually, emotionally and physically.
I will continue to be a researcher, health investigator, looking for answers, researching the latest trends and making changes in my own lifestyle....for the rest of my long life.
HEALTHY ACTIVITIES TO DO WITH FRIENDS AND BY YOURSELF
- Museums/Art Galleries
- Massage/Foot Reflexology Visit
- Farmer's Markets/Flea Markets
- Bus trip
- Road Trip
Have fun, create a balanced lifestyle and take care of yourself in the process.
Dr. Shellie Gretah Fraddin, Ph.D.
Health Coach, Motivational Speaker